Why We Must Keep Talking About Perinatal Mental Health: My Story as a Midwife and Mother.

Written By Nyiha Lawal

This post is written in honour of Maternal Mental Health Week and Maternal Mental Health Day. A time dedicated to raising awareness, breaking stigma, and amplifying the voices of those who’ve walked this path. I wanted to share my story not just as a midwife, but as a mother who’s lived it.

Perinatal mental health is the emotional wellbeing of someone during pregnancy and in the year after birth. I’ve witnessed first hand how powerful it is when someone feels seen, heard, and supported and how painful it can be when they don’t.

During my second pregnancy, I experienced both antenatal and postnatal depression. It was triggered by a lack of support, abnormal screening results, and the uncertainty that comes with unexpected life changes. I thought that being a midwife would help me navigate it; boy was I wrong. I understood the physiology, the risk factors, the symptoms, the science; but nothing prepared me for the lived experience.

To say I was blindsided would be an understatement. The fear was immediate and heavy. I felt overwhelmed, with little time to process it all and even less support to lean on. But life kept moving: appointments, scans, work, family.

After a lonely birth, I spent months trying to bond with my daughter, hoping to rebuild a connection that felt broken. Despite everything I was doing, postnatal depression still took hold. I reached out to my health visitor for help, but my concerns were dismissed. Sadly, this is an experience far too many women share.

Being dismissed made me question what I was feeling. I started to doubt myself, wondering if it really was “that bad,” or if I was just failing to cope. That uncertainty caused a delay in seeking further help, and it wasn’t until I saw a compassionate GP that I finally felt heard and understood.

That turning point was the beginning of my healing, and it deepened my commitment to ensuring no one feels alone or ignored in their experience. That journey changed me. It continues to shape how I show up as a midwife, and through the support I offer via Perinatal Roots.

Two month’s postpartum

Daily walk’s in the park was one of many coping mechanism’s.

The Numbers Speak Loudly

Recent UK data reminds us just how urgent this issue is:

  • 1 in 4 women experience mental health challenges during pregnancy or within the first year postpartum.

  • Maternal suicide is the leading cause of death between 6 weeks and 1 year after birth.

  • Over 57,000 women accessed perinatal mental health services last year; a record high, but still not enough.

Behind each statistic is a story like mine and maybe like yours. It’s a reminder that perinatal mental health still matters, and your story is valid.

So Why Don’t We Hear More?
Shame, stigma, and a lack of awareness keep too many women silent. And for some especially Black and Asian women, or those living in more deprived areas the risks are even greater. Maternal mortality remains disproportionately high due to ongoing inequality in care and support.

Let’s Do Better , Together
When we speak openly, listen without judgment, and make information more accessible, we create real change. Perinatal mental health is not a side issue. It’s central to the safety and well-being of mothers, babies, and families.

If you’re struggling, please know you are not alone. There is no shame in needing help, and there is strength in reaching out. And if you're supporting someone on this journey, your presence can make a world of difference.

Let’s keep the conversation going. Let’s keep showing up, for ourselves, for each other, and for those still finding the words.

Where to Get Support

If you’re struggling with your mental health during pregnancy or after birth, you are not alone. Support is available.

Here are some helpful resources:

You deserve care, compassion, and support. Please reach out if you need it.

Nyisha x



 

Nyiha Lawal
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